Purging the galaxy of the Jupiter threat

"Jupiter is the biggest planet,” Trump added, “and thus defeating it is the greatest military victory ever and makes me the greatest president ever.”

RNC Surprise: Trump Announces Space Force Has Defeated Jupiter

CHARLOTTE, NC—The Republican National Convention has been President Trump’s chance to speak directly to the American people and make the case for his re-election, and Trump saved one big surprise announcement for it: the United States Space Force has defeated the planet Jupiter.“I …

The Babylon Bee